Why do break-ups hurt so much?

Replies to This Discussion

Permalink Reply by hiba on September 1, 2009 at 5:32pm

Hi Sabine ;
Every thing you post is very interesting;well really breaks-up hurt so much especially when we are attached emotionally,we feel like if we are loosing a part of us;by the way Sabine I think that you understand Frensh,cause I prefer to express my self in Frensh""dans la vie il ya des moment ou une personne vous manque beaucoup et vous avez envie de la faire sortir de vos reve pour la serrer tres fort dans vos bras, et quant une porte de bonheur se ferme ,il y a forcement une autre qui s'ouvre mai nous continuons toujours de regarder celle que nous venons de fermer "" this exactely expresses why breaks-up are hurting,I hope my message will be understood.

Cheers.

▶ Reply to This

Permalink Reply by ♥ Sabine ♥ on September 1, 2009 at 5:55pm

I understand this "in life there are moments when you miss someone very much and you want to get her out of your dream to the very tight in your arms, and as one door of happiness closes, is necessarily one that opens May we always continue to watch it just to close "
Like you said, memories are what make it seem to last forever, and when something ends, we can't help but replay things back, you know. like a movie in our heads.

▶ Reply to This

Permalink Reply by hiba on September 1, 2009 at 6:02pm

Thanks Sabine this is exactely what I meantin Frensh.
many thanks.

▶ Reply to This

Permalink Reply by ♥ Sabine ♥ on September 2, 2009 at 12:12am

Awww. That makes me sad : (

▶ Reply to This

Permalink Reply by ♥ Sabine ♥ on September 2, 2009 at 9:49pm

because what is the feeling of love without hurt? it wouldn't be as sweet if you havent felt the pain... -hugggg- Thank you Nairy.

▶ Reply to This

Permalink Reply by kring_girl on September 2, 2009 at 7:00am

Why?
I barely ask that question yet i keep going through the pain. When we broke up, the only questions that blow my mind were "why is this happening to me?", why did he left me", "what have I done wrong that I fell on this painful line?" and "how could I get him back?"

Ask me of the pain. It's like living in hell everyday. You don't want to cry but tears still fall until you'll cry harder and you feel like your eyes are going to bleed in wound. It is so painful that I have to waste half of my day with my friend recalling the things that we've been through before I could work again. And even during in my work, I could cry in the midst of it. Then as I start crying it continues until I sleep myself. Gosh, that was really terrible. I always need someone to talk to in the morning and I need to sleep early in the evening to get rid of his thoughts.
Then I blame no one. After all my tears, I still love him and I still want him back that I told myself to wait for him in the future.

Sounds foolish. Perhaps this is what they mean by foolish love.

▶ Reply to This

Permalink Reply by ♥ Sabine ♥ on September 2, 2009 at 9:47pm

Yeah! losing a loved one will always hurt and its the memories that hurt the most. at least think of it in a way that you got the chance to experience those moments with that person. even though its memories you miss, its memories you can look back to...
Like you said, make more memories, make every moment worth while.
*Hugs*

▶ Reply to This

Permalink Reply by nalini on September 2, 2009 at 1:05pm

I think what hurts us is the knowledge that we have lost something; or the feeling that we have been rejected.

▶ Reply to This

Permalink Reply by ♥ Sabine ♥ on September 2, 2009 at 10:43pm

Lost something? feeling that we have been rejected??
I prefer to say losing "someone" we love. I am not an object, I'm a person with feelings to surface. I'm not talking about losing a shoe, I speak of breaking a relationship.
Rejection is inevitable, and that its happened to all, that is normal. That hurt so bad, yes, it is part of growing up. Everything is growing and learning.
so i don't know if death hurts. but break-ups suck.

▶ Reply to This

Permalink Reply by nalini on September 3, 2009 at 6:29pm

When I say something, I mean not the person we loved, but other things such as, the feeling of loving and being loved, the feeling of belonging, the knowledge that someone is there for me, the feeling that someone actually wants me... things like that. That's why we moan even when we didn't like the person we broke up with. Even with such a bad person, someone who hurt us while being with us, we tend to have these other 'things', the feelings like the above. And they are so comforting.

▶ Reply to This

Permalink Reply by ♥ Sabine ♥ on September 4, 2009 at 1:31am

Depuis longtemps mon cœur Etait à la retraite
Et ne pensait jamais Devoir se réveiller
Mais au son de ta voix J'ai relevé la tête
Et l'amour m'a repris Avant que d'y penser
Comme on passe le doigt Entre l'arbre et l'écorce L'amour s'est infiltré
S'est glissé sous ma peau Avec tant d'insistance
Et avec tant de force Que je n'ai plus depuis
Ni calme ni repos Les heures près de toi
Fuient comme des secondes.
Les journées loin de toi Ressemblent à des années
Qui donnent à mon amour Un goût de fin du monde
Elles troublent mon corps Autant que ma pensée
Tu vis dans la lumière Et moi dans les coins sombres
Car tu te meurs de vivre
Et je me meurs d'amour Je me contentarais
De caresser ton ombre Si tu voulais m'offrir
Ton destin pour toujours.
[ For a long time my heart was retired and never thought to wake
Duty But the sound of your voice
I looked up and love me again before thinking about it
as you pass your finger between the tree
The bark and the love has crept crept under my skin
so insistently and with such force that
I have been neither quiet nor repose hours near you fly like seconds
Days away from you.
Look like in the years to give my love taste of doom
They disturb my body as far as my mind
You live in me
And the light in dark corners
For you die to live And I'm dying of love I contentArea
From caress your shadow If you wanted to give me
Your destiny forever.]

▶ Reply to This