The community based on the iPersonic personality test.

Jealousy

I can't stand it when my man plays basketball, and there is another girl playing, i think i'm pretty good at basketball, but he never asks me to play, do you think its because i'm short, and hes tall? i dont know, help me ladies.

the idea of a gril gaurding my man, her butt up against him blocking him out. makes me mad. so please tell me what you think.

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Permalink Reply by swe on March 30, 2009 at 2:21am: Hi, Allissa... I would say, it is a normal reaction to feel jealous here; I know for I felt myself in the same way for a long time as the man I love meets a lot of people - and women - by his work. Sometimes I'd got crazy when some "shiny beauty" had flirted with him; in such a situations I usually had remembered to myself all of my "imperfections" (in look or in character), etc. etc. But you know, Allissa, no matter how many are these "imperfections" in my opinion, I saw that in the long run he likes them much more than all "perfections" what such an woman could show or give him. So, I would say, even if you are jealous now, don't make him feel guilty if he isn't. And don't make him feel you don't care, of course. Give him to know you feel confused, irritated and even sad; but say this with no anger. Anger never helps (as well as blank silence doesn't). And have you told him you want to play with him? If no, do it. If yes, do it again. If he still doesn't want you as a partner, think about is it possible that he feels too much "possessed". Because if he doesn't feel in this way, he wouldn't mind to be your partner in the games too. Otherwise, the sooner you'll know he doesn't care enough about you, the better would be. Well, the last thing I said just as an option, ok? And I'm wishing you all the best about the situation, that's for sure, Allissa!!; ▶ Reply to This

Permalink Reply by Allissa on March 30, 2009 at 3:13pm: I'm glad its normal, thank you for taking the time to write so detailed. i did tell him with out anger so now i feel like i did the right thing, besides i love him too much too get overly upset about some girl who "might" gaurd him. lol add me sister.; ▶ Reply to This

Permalink Reply by swe on April 1, 2009 at 6:41am: Done:)); ▶ Reply to This

Permalink Reply by be good twice on March 30, 2009 at 11:54am: I have no advises (yes) but I have some thoughts )))
No one could stop anyone. It is no needs to stop anyone.
Well, I have just seen your profile. You said NO REGRETS. This is good idea so do what you can and no regrets ;-))
Tell me please what is 'gaurding' meens? Sorry, my English isn't good )); ▶ Reply to This

Permalink Reply by kring_girl on March 30, 2009 at 1:13pm: "gaurding". I think there was a little typographical error in her words. She had jumbled her "guarding" and typed "gaurding" instead. ^-^; ▶ Reply to This

Permalink Reply by be good twice on March 31, 2009 at 11:32am: O! Thanks a lot for explanation! I coulnd't found this word in my dictionary -)); ▶ Reply to This

Permalink Reply by Allissa on March 30, 2009 at 3:15pm: you know in basketball, the sport... the defence has to stop the offence from scoring, its like "covering" that person, which involves some touching..; ▶ Reply to This

Permalink Reply by be good twice on March 31, 2009 at 12:13pm: I think jealousy will have eaten anyone if s/he let it grow. It belongs to dark side of the power.; ▶ Reply to This

Permalink Reply by swe on April 1, 2009 at 7:13am: Totally agree...; ▶ Reply to This

Permalink Reply by Allissa on March 31, 2009 at 3:31pm: well i was invited, but there wasn't anywhere for me to sit, it was a very small indoor basketball court. trust me if i wasn't invited, i would of been even more upset. lol; ▶ Reply to This

Permalink Reply by Emina on March 31, 2009 at 12:38pm: It's normal to feel jealous from time to time :) It means you care about him.. What's not normal is when you get obsessive about it.. when that turns into possesivness, that's what kills the relationship...
Would you play basketball because you like it, or because you don't like the idea of him playing with other girls? Relax.. you can't go on thinking and getting worried over things like that, it's not healthy to do EVERYTHING TOGETHER...; ▶ Reply to This

Permalink Reply by Allissa on March 31, 2009 at 3:34pm: good thing i'm not obsessive, i do care about him more then anyone, he would never hurt me... Trust me i'm not the clingy type, im glad he's not, i kinda just tell him bluntly all the time about everything, and i've told him i dont want to work with him since we are both looking for better jobs.

Thank you.; ▶ Reply to This